September 22, 2009

More pics and an update

Posted in Remodeling tagged , at 12:36 pm by lifebytheday

Our friend finally left yesterday (S actually drove him back up to Maine because his wife had left without him on Sunday ;-)) and this is what my bathroom looked like after they were done for the night (time stamp – Monday at 9pm). 


(Don’t get too excited, the toilet’s only in there temporarily, lol.)

And a view of the new vanity:



Despite the fact that they got SO much done (that I made absolutely NO contribution to), I still had a mini-meltdown after work yesterday.  A long time ago, we agreed to dog sit this coming weekend, not knowing what we were getting ourselves into with the bathroom.  Then, just yesterday, I found out that by “weekend” our friends actually meant Wednesday night to Sunday.  Ahhhh!  We absolutely don’t mind, but that means that we have to be back in the house by tomorrow (!), and we’re definitely not ready.  So our plan now is to put a baby gate at the bottom of the stairs and keep the dogs downstairs – we’ll sleep downstairs too, on the pull out couch in the living room.  I’m going over to the house tonight to do a macro clean, and S (and our lifesaver friend B) are going to continue working away. 

I’m just glad that I decided to take Friday off…I’ll take one last shower at my parents’ on Wednesday night and then hope for the best! 😉


September 20, 2009

Bathroom photos

Posted in Remodeling tagged at 9:11 pm by lifebytheday

This is what my bathroom looks like as of 9pm Sunday night, after a long weekend of work.  Don’t worry, not my work…the only thing I did was load the dumpster!  😉  (The photos aren’t great quality – took them with my iPhone.)



The upstairs hallway, how you know you’ve entered the construction zone.



My dad and our friend working on the plumbing.



The new wall between the bathroom and guest room.



Wide view of the bathroom…that pipe is where the old wall used to be!



Our sexy new tub!!!

The guys’ goal for tonight is to turn the water on, check the new pipes for leaks, and fill the tub – anybody need a bath? 😉


Posted in Friends, Remodeling tagged at 10:44 am by lifebytheday

Wow, it’s been a long time since I last posted.  Lots has happened since then…

Had a fantastic “wine o’weekend” with S and some friends.  S has a client who offered us the use of her house on the Cape, in return for picking up and re-upholstering some furniture.  It was an eventful trip – S’s van broke down halfway there, and even though we have AAA, we had to wait for hours until the towing company could get a second vehicle to tow the attached U-HAUL trailer.  We left around 7pm, and what was supposed to be an under two hour drive turned into almost six.  We arrived around 1am, driving down a pitch-dark dirt road and trying to guess which house was ours.  Finally S went to investigate and said, “Yeah, this is the one.”  “So the key worked?” “No, it was open…”  LOL!  Luckily we found a note to S, so we knew we were safe…but can you imagine?  Busting into someone’s house at 1am, with them asleep upstairs?  It rained for most of the weekend, but we had two fantastically lazy days, filled with food, friends, and a lobster pot full of sangria. 😉

Then we spent this past week preparing for the bathroom remodel.  Monday we picked out our faucets and tub/shower fixtures, Tuesday we chose the countertop (black granite with subtle gray flecks), Wednesday we moved in with my folks…and demo began Thursday!  Construction began in earnest on Friday – my dad did the electrical, S finished the demo, and then our contractor family friend arrived Friday night.  Saturday was spent moving and replacing plumbing, and putting up the sheetrock for the wall to the guest room, and today (hopefully!) the will be tub going in.  This process has made me realize what wonderful friends (and family!) we have.  Our friends have given up their whole weekend just to help us (and my parents have given up any semblance of peace at their house for the foreseeable future ;-)).

Oh, just got a call from S…gotta make a Home Depot run!  I’ll try to post some pictures tomorrow…

Happy Sunday everybody!

September 9, 2009

RE impressions

Posted in Infertility tagged , at 4:53 pm by lifebytheday

Now that I’ve had a chance to simmer down a little bit, I thought I’d share some of my impressions from yesterday’s meeting.

  • My new RE – Dr. Toth at the Vincent Center of Mass General Hospital – seems extremely kind and thoughtful.  I’m reserving judgment until I see what he recommends based on our previous IF history, but he clearly knows what he’s doing.  Besides being the chief, he’s obviously in high demand!
  • His nurse also seems very nice – funny, down to earth, and just really a good person.  During IVF cycles, I’ll be interacting more with her than with the doctor, so it was nice to feel comfortable with her right off the bat.
  • The lab is on the same floor as the main office, and it seems like only IF patients use that particular lab.  Yesterday during my blood test, I warned the phlebotomist that I hadn’t eaten or drank anything yet that morning (makes it harder to draw blood, FYI) and that I have tough veins…and not only did she get it in first time, but I didn’t even feel the needle going in!  Yay for people who know what they’re doing!! 😉
  • The location is super convenient – when I get to the point in my cycle where I’m going for a blood test and ultrasound every other day, I’ll just have to hop off the subway halfway to work, do my business, and get back on for 4 more stops!
  • The best part of all is the VIEW.  The office is located on the 10th floor, with a gorgeous view of the city of Boston.  S actually stopped on our way out to take a picture (I’ll post it later tonight. :-))

The only bad parts of the office were the receptionists – a pair of surly young ladies – but (since I didn’t meet with the doctor) at least I didn’t get charged a co-pay!  😉

September 8, 2009

Rough morning.

Posted in Infertility tagged , at 1:50 pm by lifebytheday

This morning was our first appointment with the new RE, which I was super excited for…but the whole morning was a total fiasco.  S was delayed with a client so we left a half hour later than planned, and then got stuck in the WORST traffic I’ve seen in a long time.  And let’s just say that S is NOT a patient person in traffic…  It took us an hour and fifteen (painful!) minutes to get to the hospital – 45 minutes past our scheduled appointment – at which point the RE had to take in his next patient and we officially missed our appointment. 

His nurse was gracious enough to meet with us and get a lot of the introductory paperwork started, and the doctor stopped in to say hello between appointments.  They were willing to get started with the blood work (proving that I’m not secretly pregnant) and other tests (again, proving that the problem is not related to S in any way…ahem! ;-)) so at least the morning wasn’t a total waste, but the next available appointment time isn’t until October 1st!  So much of IF is hurry up and wait – SO FRUSTRATING!!  Then, to top it all off, my boss forgot that I had an appointment and thought I was just MIA!  Grrrr….

September 7, 2009

Infertility Etiquette

Posted in Infertility at 9:45 am by lifebytheday

In preparation for our next round of IVF, I thought I’d post an article with tips for how to relate to “infertile” people.  Many of you may have read this article before, but it is SO right-on that it bears repeating (or re-posting, as the case may be ;-)).  And to my dear IRL friends who read my blog regularly, this is NOT directed towards you! 🙂

By Vita Alligood

Chances are, you know someone who is struggling with infertility. More than five million people of childbearing age in the United States experience infertility. Yet, as a society, we are woefully uninformed about how to best provide emotional support for our loved ones during this painful time.

Infertility is, indeed, a very painful struggle. The pain is similar to the grief over losing a loved one, but it is unique because it is a recurring grief. When a loved one dies, he isn’t coming back. There is no hope that he will come back from the dead. You must work through the stages of grief, accept that you will never see this person again, and move on with your life.

The grief of infertility is not so cut and dry. Infertile people grieve the loss of the baby that they may never know. They grieve the loss of that baby who would have had mommy’s nose and daddy’s eyes. But, each month, there is the hope that maybe that baby will be conceived after all. No matter how hard they try to prepare themselves for bad news, they still hope that this month will be different. Then, the bad news comes again, and the grief washes over the infertile couple anew. This process happens month after month, year after year. It is like having a deep cut that keeps getting opened right when it starts to heal.

As the couple moves into infertility treatments, the pain increases while the bank account depletes. Most infertility treatments involve using hormones, which alter the user’s moods. (That statement is like calling a lion a cat-my husband would tell you that the side effect is insanity!) The tests are invasive and embarrassing to both parties, and you feel like the doctor has taken over your bedroom. And for all of this discomfort, you pay a lot of money. Infertility treatments are expensive, and most insurance companies do not cover the costs. So, in addition to the pain of not conceiving a baby each month, the couple pays out anywhere from $300 to five figures, depending upon the treatment used.

A couple will eventually resolve the infertility problem in one of three ways:

  • They will eventually conceive a baby.
  • They will stop the infertility treatments and choose to live without children.
  • They will find an alternative way to parent, such as by adopting a child or becoming a foster parent.

Reaching a resolution can take years, so your infertile loved ones need your emotional support during this journey. Most people don’t know what to say, so they wind up saying the wrong thing, which only makes the journey so much harder for their loved ones. Knowing what not to say is half of the battle to providing support.

Don’t Tell Them to Relax

Everyone knows someone who had trouble conceiving but then finally became pregnant once she “relaxed.” Couples who are able to conceive after a few months of “relaxing” are not infertile. By definition, a couple is not diagnosed as “infertile” until they have tried unsuccessfully to become pregnant for a full year. In fact, most infertility specialists will not treat a couple for infertility until they have tried to become pregnant for a year. This year weeds out the people who aren’t infertile but just need to “relax.” Those that remain are truly infertile.

Comments such as “just relax” or “try going on a cruise” create even more stress for the infertile couple, particularly the woman. The woman feels like she is doing something wrong when, in fact, there is a good chance that there is a physical problem preventing her from becoming pregnant.

These comments can also reach the point of absurdity. As a couple, my husband and I underwent two surgeries, numerous inseminations, hormone treatments, and four years of poking and prodding by doctors. Yet, people still continued to say things like, “If you just relaxed on a cruise . . .” Infertility is a diagnosable medical problem that must be treated by a doctor, and even with treatment, many couples will NEVER successfully conceive a child. Relaxation itself does not cure medical infertility.

Don’t Minimize the Problem

Failure to conceive a baby is a very painful journey. Infertile couples are surrounded by families with children. These couples watch their friends give birth to two or three children, and they watch those children grow while the couple goes home to the silence of an empty house. These couples see all of the joy that a child brings into someone’s life, and they feel the emptiness of not being able to experience the same joy.

Comments like, “Just enjoy being able to sleep late . . . .travel . . etc.,” do not offer comfort. Instead, these comments make infertile people feel like you are minimizing their pain. You wouldn’t tell somebody whose parent just died to be thankful that he no longer has to buy Father’s Day or Mother’s Day cards. Losing that one obligation doesn’t even begin to compensate for the incredible loss of losing a parent. In the same vein, being able to sleep late or travel does not provide comfort to somebody who desperately wants a child.

Don’t Say There Are Worse Things That Could Happen

Along the same lines, don’t tell your friend that there are worse things that she could be going through. Who is the final authority on what is the “worst” thing that could happen to someone? Is it going through a divorce? Watching a loved one die? Getting raped? Losing a job?

Different people react to different life experiences in different ways. To someone who has trained his whole life for the Olympics, the “worst” thing might be experiencing an injury the week before the event. To someone who has walked away from her career to become a stay-at-home wife for 40 years, watching her husband leave her for a younger woman might be the “worst” thing. And, to a woman whose sole goal in life has been to love and nurture a child, infertility may indeed be the “worst” thing that could happen.

People wouldn’t dream of telling someone whose parent just died, “It could be worse: both of your parents could be dead.” Such a comment would be considered cruel rather than comforting. In the same vein, don’t tell your friend that she could be going through worse things than infertility.

Don’t Say They Aren’t Meant to Be Parents

One of the cruelest things anyone ever said to me is, “Maybe God doesn’t intend for you to be a mother.” How incredibly insensitive to imply that I would be such a bad mother that God felt the need to divinely sterilize me. If God were in the business of divinely sterilizing women, don’t you think he would prevent the pregnancies that end in abortions? Or wouldn’t he sterilize the women who wind up neglecting and abusing their children? Even if you aren’t religious, the “maybe it’s not meant to be” comments are not comforting. Infertility is a medical condition, not a punishment from God or Mother Nature.

Don’t Ask Why They Aren’t Trying IVF

In vitro fertilization (IVF) is a method in which the woman harvests multiple eggs, which are then combined with the man’s sperm in a petri dish. This is the method that can produce multiple births. People frequently ask, “Why don’t you just try IVF?” in the same casual tone they would use to ask, “Why don’t you try shopping at another store?”

There are many reasons why a couple would choose not to pursue this option. Here are a few of them.

IVF is Expensive with Low Odds

One cycle of IVF is very expensive. With all of the hype in the news, many people assume that IVF is a sure thing when, in fact, the odds of success for each cycle are low. Most couples cannot afford to try for one month, much less for multiple times. Considering that it also costs a significant amount of money to adopt a baby, many couples opt for the “sure thing” rather then risking their money on much lower odds.

IVF is Physically Taxing

Undergoing IVF treatments is very rigorous. The woman must inject shots into her thigh daily to cause her ovaries to superovulate. The drugs used are very taxing on the woman, and they can cause her to be become extremely emotional.

IVF Raises Ethical Issues

Ironically, couples who undergo IVF to become parents may have to selectively abort one or more fetuses if multiple eggs are fertilized. Many couples cannot bring themselves to abort a baby when they have worked so hard to become parents. If the couple chooses not to selectively abort, they run the risk of multiple births.

Don’t Offer Unsolicited Opinions If They Are Trying IVF

On the flip side of the coin, don’t offer unsolicited advice to your friends who do choose to try IVF. For many couples, IVF is the only way they will ever give birth to a baby. This is a huge decision for them to make, for all of the reasons I outlined above.

If the couple has resolved any ethical issues, don’t muddy the waters. IVF is a gray area in many ethical circles, and many of our moral leaders don’t yet know how to answer the ethical questions that have arisen from this new technology. If the couple has resolved these issues already, you only make it harder by raising the ethical questions again. Respect their decision, and offer your support. If you can’t offer your support due to ethical differences of opinion, then say nothing.

A couple who chooses the IVF route has a hard, expensive road ahead, and they need your support more than ever. The hormones are no cakewalk, and the financial cost is enormous. Your friend would not be going this route if there were an easier way, and the fact that she is willing to endure so much is further proof of how much she truly wants to parent a child. The hormones will make her more emotional, so offer her your support and keep your questions to yourself.

Don’t Play Doctor

Once your infertile friends are under a doctor’s care, the doctor will run them through numerous tests to determine why they aren’t able to conceive. There a numerous reasons that a couple may not be able to conceive. Here are a few of them:

  • Blocked fallopian tubes
  • Cysts
  • Endometriosis
  • Low hormone levels
  • Low “normal form” sperm count
  • Low progesterone level
  • Low sperm count
  • Low sperm motility
  • Thin uterine walls

Infertility is a complicated problem to diagnose, and reading an article or book on infertility will not make you an “expert” on the subject. Let your friends work with their doctor to diagnose and treat the problem. Your friends probably already know more about the causes and solutions of infertility than you will ever know.

You may feel like you are being helpful by reading up on infertility, and there is nothing wrong with learning more about the subject. The problem comes when you try to “play doctor” with your friends. They already have a doctor with years of experience in diagnosing and treating the problem. They need to work with and trust their doctor to treat the problem. You only complicate the issue when you throw out other ideas that you have read about. The doctor knows more about the causes and solutions; let your friends work with their doctor to solve the problem.

Don’t Be Crude

It is appalling that I even have to include this paragraph, but some of you need to hear this-Don’t make crude jokes about your friend’s vulnerable position. Crude comments like “I’ll donate the sperm” or “Make sure the doctor uses your sperm for the insemination” are not funny, and they only irritate your friends.

Don’t Complain About Your Pregnancy

This message is for pregnant women-Just being around you is painful for your infertile friends. Seeing your belly grow is a constant reminder of what your infertile friend cannot have. Unless an infertile women plans to spend her life in a cave, she has to find a way to interact with pregnant women. However, there are things you can do as her friend to make it easier.

The number one rule is DON’T COMPLAIN ABOUT YOUR PREGNANCY. I understand from my friends that, when you are pregnant, your hormones are going crazy and you experience a lot of discomfort, such as queasiness, stretch marks, and fatigue. You have every right to vent about the discomforts to any one else in your life, but don’t put your infertile friend in the position of comforting you.

Your infertile friend would give anything to experience the discomforts you are enduring because those discomforts come from a baby growing inside of you. When I heard a pregnant woman complain about morning sickness, I would think, “I’d gladly throw up for nine straight months if it meant I could have a baby.” When a pregnant woman would complain about her weight gain, I would think, “I would cut off my arm if I could be in your shoes.”

I managed to go to baby showers and hospitals to welcome my friends’ new babies, but it was hard. Without exception, it was hard. Stay sensitive to your infertile friend’s emotions, and give her the leeway that she needs to be happy for you while she cries for herself. If she can’t bring herself to hold your new baby, give her time. She isn’t rejecting you or your new baby; she is just trying to work her way through her pain to show sincere joy for you. The fact that she is willing to endure such pain in order to celebrate your new baby with you speaks volumes about how much your friendship means to her.

Don’t Treat Them Like They Are Ignorant

For some reason, some people seem to think that infertility causes a person to become unrealistic about the responsibilities of parenthood. I don’t follow the logic, but several people told me that I wouldn’t ache for a baby so much if I appreciated how much responsibility was involved in parenting.

Let’s face it-no one can fully appreciate the responsibilities involved in parenting until they are, themselves, parents. That is true whether you successfully conceived after one month or after 10 years. The length of time you spend waiting for that baby does not factor in to your appreciation of responsibility. If anything, people who have been trying to become pregnant longer have had more time to think about those responsibilities. They have also probably been around lots of babies as their friends started their families.

Perhaps part of what fuels this perception is that infertile couples have a longer time to “dream” about what being a parent will be like. Like every other couple, we have our fantasies-my child will sleep through the night, would never have a tantrum in public, and will always eat his vegetables. Let us have our fantasies. Those fantasies are some of the few parent-to-be perks that we have-let us have them. You can give us your knowing looks when we discover the truth later.

Don’t Gossip About Your Friend’s Condition

Infertility treatments are very private and embarrassing, which is why many couples choose to undergo these treatments in secret. Men especially are very sensitive to letting people know about infertility testing, such as sperm counts. Gossiping about infertility is not usually done in a malicious manner. The gossipers are usually well-meaning people who are only trying to find out more about infertility so they can help their loved ones.

Regardless of why you are sharing this information with someone else, it hurts and embarrasses your friend to find out that Madge the bank teller knows what your husband’s sperm count is and when your next period is expected. Infertility is something that should be kept as private as your friend wants to keep it. Respect your friend’s privacy, and don’t share any information that your friend hasn’t authorized.

Don’t Push Adoption (Yet)

Adoption is a wonderful way for infertile people to become parents. (As an adoptive parent, I can fully vouch for this!!) However, the couple needs to work through many issues before they will be ready to make an adoption decision. Before they can make the decision to love a “stranger’s baby,” they must first grieve the loss of that baby with Daddy’s eyes and Mommy’s nose. Adoption social workers recognize the importance of the grieving process. When my husband and I went for our initial adoption interview, we expected the first question to be, “Why do you want to adopt a baby?” Instead, the question was, “Have you grieved the loss of your biological child yet?” Our social worker emphasized how important it is to shut one door before you open another.

You do, indeed, need to grieve this loss before you are ready to start the adoption process. The adoption process is very long and expensive, and it is not an easy road. So, the couple needs to be very sure that they can let go of the hope of a biological child and that they can love an adopted baby. This takes time, and some couples are never able to reach this point. If your friend cannot love a baby that isn’t her “own,” then adoption isn’t the right decision for her, and it is certainly not what is best for the baby.

Mentioning adoption in passing can be a comfort to some couples. (The only words that ever offered me comfort were from my sister, who said, “Whether through pregnancy or adoption, you will be a mother one day.”) However, “pushing” the issue can frustrate your friend. So, mention the idea in passing if it seems appropriate, and then drop it. When your friend is ready to talk about adoption, she will raise the issue herself.

So, what can you say to your infertile friends? Unless you say “I am giving you this baby,” there is nothing you can say that will erase their pain. So, take that pressure off of yourself. It isn’t your job to erase their pain, but there is a lot you can do to lesson the load. Here are a few ideas.

Let Them Know That You Care

The best thing you can do is let your infertile friends know that you care. Send them cards. Let them cry on your shoulder. If they are religious, let them know you are praying for them. Offer the same support you would offer a friend who has lost a loved one. Just knowing they can count on you to be there for them lightens the load and lets them know that they aren’t going through this alone.

Remember Them on Mother’s Day

With all of the activity on Mother’s Day, people tend to forget about women who cannot become mothers. Mother’s Day is an incredibly painful time for infertile women. You cannot get away from it-There are ads on the TV, posters at the stores, church sermons devoted to celebrating motherhood, and all of the plans for celebrating with your own mother and mother-in-law.

Mother’s Day is an important celebration and one that I relish now that I am a mother. However, it was very painful while I was waiting for my baby. Remember your infertile friends on Mother’s Day, and send them a card to let them know you are thinking of them. They will appreciate knowing that you haven’t “forgotten” them.

Support Their Decision to Stop Treatments

No couple can endure infertility treatments forever. At some point, they will stop. This is an agonizing decision to make, and it involves even more grief. Even if the couple chooses to adopt a baby, they must still first grieve the loss of that baby who would have had mommy’s nose and daddy’s eyes.

Once the couple has made the decision to stop treatments, support their decision. Don’t encourage them to try again, and don’t discourage them from adopting, if that is their choice. Once the couple has reached resolution (whether to live without children, adopt a child, or become foster parents), they can finally put that chapter of their lives behind them. Don’t try to open that chapter again.

September 5, 2009

Reflections and re-posts

Posted in Blog, Life at 9:30 am by lifebytheday

This was my first ever blog post – a year ago, in August 2008 – posted to a writing community website, hosted by a family friend.  It’s really funny to re-read, definitely a different tone than my current blog…but I thought it was appropriate to share now because it’s about our vacation spot up in Maine, where we’ll be for the long weekend. 

Wishing you all a happy, healthy, RELAXING Labor Day weekend – see you Tuesday!!


My Special Place

   Do you have a special place?  Somewhere that gives you peace and fills you with joy, just by virtue of you being there?  My special place may not seem that special to others, but to me – and to my family – it’s heaven on earth.

   Since I can remember – in fact, since my parents were teenagers – my family has spent the 4th of July weekend, Labor Day, and the first week of August, on a small lake in central Maine.  When my mother and her siblings were young, my grandparents bought a small cottage on the sandy shores of Pleasant Lake.  I grew up with this magical place as a getaway and it’s one of the things that I’ve never taken for granted.

   Now, you have to understand, staying at the cottage means roughing it – no toilets (outhouse behind the house), no hot water (cold water pumped from the lake to the sink and an outside shower), and no entertainment (t.v. and video games are categorically not allowed).  But because of this, being at the lake encouraged us (my brothers, cousins, friends, and I) to think outside the box.  On sunny days, we can be found out on the beach, in the water, or behind a boat.  Rainy days present an unique challenge – I think I’ve played more cards and board games in that one-room cottage than anywhere else on earth!  When we were younger, we did things like collecting rocks and painting them like Easter eggs, which gradually evolved to games like flashlight tag and cops ‘n robbers as we grew up.  For many of my cousins and friends, Pleasant Lake is where we came of age – first kisses, first drinks, and best friends.

   Our cottage is shared between my mother and our family, and the families of her four siblings, and many of the neighbors have similar arrangements – cottages shared among children, grandchildren, and, for some, even great-grandchildren!  Close relationships have developed between the families – unique bonds from a special shared experience.  I know that I can go through the winter without talking to any of our neighbors (with the exception of a Christmas card perhaps) and pick up right where we’ve left off come summertime. 

   Pleasant Lake (and the community it entails) is so important to us all that often girlfriends and boyfriends must be given “the lake test” before the relationship becomes really serious.  Not only must they survive the rustic conditions (extra points if it rains!), but they must actually enjoy it, and must gain the approval (silent or not-so-silent) of the extended lake family.  I had one boyfriend that did not pass the test, while my husband – a city boy from Dublin – passed with flying colors.  Our friends at the lake know us as well (if not better than!) as the other members of our family and we are all blessed to have these people in our lives.

   There is nothing better than waking up to the sound of camp bells across the lake, walking out to the end of the dock with a cup of coffee in hand, looking across at the mist rising off of the still, gray water.  Or going inside to escape the late afternoon sun and falling asleep with the wind blowing through the open doors and the waves lapping at the shore.  Or sitting beside a crackling campfire, making s’mores, telling jokes and listening to stories repeated year after year, and watching the stars appear in the inky blue sky.

   If I could only live in one place for the rest of my life, I’d choose our cottage on Pleasant Lake – outhouse and all!  What is your special place?

September 4, 2009

More bathroom

Posted in Remodeling tagged at 8:05 am by lifebytheday

I realized I haven’t given a bathroom update this week, and I didn’t want any of you to feel left out of the insanity – I mean, fun! 😉  Regrettably, just because I haven’t mentioned the renovations lately, doesn’t mean that all is sunshine and light at my house…

Last Friday, we made last minute plans with some good friends of ours, and ended up talking about our bathroom renovations over dinner.  This couple just recently finished a big kitchen remodel, which they largely did themselves, so S spent the night asking our guy friend questions about this or that, while I commiserated with my girl friend about the chaos and mess! 😛  We decided to continue our night back at our place…one thing led to another…and before we knew it, S and B were demo-ing the bathroom wall!  And I mean, really demolishing it…B and C stayed overnight, but had to sleep on the pull-out couch in our living room because the guest room then had a nice view of the toilet! 


Saturday, S and I finished the rest of the demo, and then S framed out the new wall on Sunday.

Next steps – my dad has to pull the electrical through the studs, and then S will put up the sheetrock for the new wall.  And save the date, the official remodel begins on September 17th!  We’ll move out that Wednesday, S will spend Thursday demo-ing the rest of the bathroom (tub, tiles, etc.), and then our family friend arrives Friday to do the plumbing and help S install the new tub, sink, etc.  The beginning of the following week we’ll be tiling and painting, and then we should be back in by Wednesday or so. 

I just can’t wait until it’s all DONE…

September 3, 2009

Random thoughts

Posted in Furbabies, Infertility, Life at 9:39 am by lifebytheday

I haven’t been able to wrap my brain around any sort of entertaining (or even coherent!) post, but thought I’d share some of the things currently bouncing around in my mind…

  1. Happily, Killian and Bailey are finally starting to figure each other out.  If Bailey settles down, Killian will venture out from under the couch, but that only lasts until Bailey realizes that her new little brother is really just a cuddly toy that moves.  As soon as Killian walks away from her, she takes off after him…they do a quick loop around the kitchen, he darts back under the couch, and Bailey resumes whimpering. 😉
  2. I really need to find the energy to accomplish ALL of our laundry at the same time, because right now, the pile of my clothes that need to be put away is starting to resemble a mountain on the verge of a landslide.  The way I currently handle it is to wash my clothes, hang them on clothes horses, and then just take off outfits as I need them.  The problem with that is that the clothes stay there so long that they actually start to smell, and I have to rewash a good chunk of them!  But by the end of a long work day, I’d MUCH rather crash on the couch, watch tv, hang out with S, play with the animals…anything besides do laundry!  And when I do manage to do a few loads, it’s always towels, or S’s clothes…  But S promised he’d help me tonight – we have a laundry date – aren’t we romantic? 😉
  3. A good friend sent me this link today ( to a story about requiring background checks for IVF patients.  She was totally horrified, which was super cute, but I actually wasn’t that surprised.  It’s already so difficult to get approved for adoption or insurance coverage for fertility treatments, why wouldn’t they add another hoop for infertile people to jump through, just to be able to be parents like everybody else?!
  4. Our appointment with the new RE is Tuesday morning.  I’m excited to finally be moving forward, but I’m also nervous and anxious (partly because I know what to expect, but also because I’m scared that it won’t work, again.)

September 1, 2009

Welcome Killian!

Posted in Furbabies tagged , at 11:30 am by lifebytheday

We picked up our newest addition to the family yesterday – meet Killian! 
(We decided to save “Jameson” for doggie #2.  I know, we’re insane ;-P)

He was really tired last night after his surgery, but he has already settled in.  (As I write this, I’m working from home and watching him run and slide across my hardwood floors. 😉  His grandma just brought over a toy fish on a string and he has been playing with it for the last hour!)

Bailey loves him so much she wants to eat him, so we spent the night holding Killian up high and trying to teach Bailey “leave it” lol!

Some pictures 🙂






On the way home






Curled up on the window seat





Poser 😉






Checking out Daddy’s beer!

(P.S, S never drinks Bud Light but had one in the fridge and was like, make sure you get the label in the picture and we’ll send it to them, LOL!)