February 2, 2011
22 week update
First of all, thank you so much for the great feedback regarding my OB freakout. I am going to wait and see what happens at my next appointment and then will make a decision for us moving forward. I’m planning to do a lot more reading and research about doulas, natural childbirth, and advocating for yourself…but I feel better that S and I will be able to work together to handle whatever comes our way.
I had a day full of appointments yesterday – first with my acupuncturist/herbalist and then a shiatsu massage (from his wife). Some of you may recall that I broke up with my acupuncturist over a year ago…well, when my leg got bad I decided to get back in touch with their office, in the hopes that something would help. (Some of you mentioned a chiropractor, but I was cautioned against doing that since pregnant muscles are extra pliable and may be stretched too far.) Despite a great few hours of being pampered (the benefits of snow days and “working” from home), my numb leg came back pretty soon afterwards. I’m still taking B12, under their guidance, and hoping that might make a difference. After that, I think I’ll just have to accept the fact that these are the cards I was dealt. In the grand scheme of things, I still got away easy. 😉
Here’s a quick 22 week update:
How am I feeling? Getting tired, and uncomfortable when I eat too much again, and starting to get heartburn. Oh and don’t forget my numb/burning legs. But loving the continued belly growth!
Weight gain? +5 lbs (as soon as I asked the doctor about my weight I started gaining…story of my life 😉 )
Cravings? None right now, still trying to cut back on the sugar and add in more fruits and vegetables.
Milestones? Feeling the baby move from the outside, and having S feel it for the first time!
August 26, 2010
Question of the day
To all of my fellow IF-sufferers, but specifically those who are pregnant or parenting post-IF, did you do anything non-(Western)-medical that made a difference in your successful cycle? Chinese medicine, supplements, special diets, old wives’ tales??
As most of you know, I’ve done everything from acupuncture and herbs to no gluten/no dairy/no sugar…but nothing seemed to help. I just don’t want to feel like I left anything on the table with this last cycle…
October 10, 2009
Breaking up is hard to do-oooooo
Several weeks ago, I finally sent off an email that I had been dreading for a long time, telling my acupuncturist/herbalist that we would be moving forward with IVF #3, and effectively dashing both of our dreams that we could use TCM (chinese medicine) to get me pregnant “naturally.” I know that it was ridiculous for me to care as much as I did, but I really felt like I was breaking up with him. Even though I had planned to continue acupuncture during IVF, I knew that this would essentially say to him that I knew his way wasn’t working, and I felt bad. We also had grown closer (I thought!) than a standard client/practicioner relationship because I had been regularly babysitting for his son and bartering our services. Add that to the fact that he really stands by his practice and Eastern medicine in general, and doesn’t seem to believe in (or agree with) IVF, and I was a bit worried about being judged.
After over a week of radio silence, I finally got a response. Here are some of my favorite (insert sarcasm here) parts:
- In response to my comment that I’d be seeing the chief (doctor) at one of the best teaching hospitals in the state:
Does he wear a big headress with feathers and do you smoke a ceremonial long pipe in his teepee? - In response to my saying that I feel good about moving forward, but hope that he’s not disappointed in me:
Sure, it is your choice…I just want you to be strong enough to carry the pregnancy.
And more of the same…essentially what I thought was a very condescending and not at all supportive response. After asking him to clarify what he meant by not being strong enough (to which his answer was concerning uterine lining and hormone levels – not related to any specific problems I’ve had, just the things that are important to a successful pregnancy, and also, clearly all things that the doctors would also be monitoring!), I basically said that I thought we should take a break. After lots of awkward back and forth where I had to explain what parts of his email I thought were condescending (!), I finally got the response I had been looking for, which was a simple “I sincerely wish you guys the best – you so deserve to have a family. Please do keep me posted.”
At this point, I still feel a bit sad that things had to end this way, but I’m proud of myself for standing up to him. He deals with clients with serious and sensitive health issues on a regular basis, and I felt like he needed to know how he was coming across to others and that I needed to stand up for those who might not be able to stand up for themselves!
March 2, 2009
The power of words
For the past few months, I’ve been doing acupuncture treatments, in addition to vitamins and herbal supplements, and an intense new diet (NO dairy or sugar…at all!). I’ll talk more about those things later…
But in addition to all of that, I’ve also recently started receiving shiatsu massage, which works with the same principles as acupuncture, but in a more hands-on, massage-based therapy. The goal with this type of treatment is to get the energy flowing through my body in a more balanced way, hopefully kick-starting my cycle naturally… At this point, I’ll try anything. 😉
So anyways, during my treatment this weekend, my masseuse was talking a lot about the power of words and thoughts. That my past experiences have contributed to the way I think about my body, and that those thoughts can actually affect the way my body works. If you think about that, it makes complete sense. I’ve thought of myself as “broken” for so long, that I almost forget I have reproductive organs at all! And I’m definitely not “connected” to them in any way… 😉 So why would they even bother trying to work again?
We discussed the need for me to shift my thoughts and feelings to a more positive view about my body…to stop re-hashing the problems and shortcomings, and start focusing on the way I’d like it to be.
So with that goal in mind, here are the words that used to define me…
Infertile
Broken
Tired
Lazy
Dysfunctional
Blocked
Stagnant
Suppressed
…
And these are the words that I’m going to focus on from now on…
Active
Supportive
Flowing
ALIVE
Open
Balanced
Energetic
Vital
Maternal
FERTILE!
Every time I think of a word from the first list, I’m going to throw that word away, and replace that thought with its opposite. I think this is a good lesson for all of us, in all aspects of our life. Words have the power to harm, but also the power to heal…so why not put them to good use!?!
Life by the Day 