February 16, 2011

Why can’t I just be ignorant…

Posted in Pregnancy tagged , at 10:29 am by lifebytheday

…and blissful?

I know that the other IFers out there understand all too well the dilemma of knowing TOO much about everything that could possibly go wrong over the course of a pregnancy.  Up until now, I haven’t really focused on the negative possibilities – thank God, I haven’t had any reason to – but I never realized how close to the surface my worries really were.

I spent yesterday in a mild state of panic because I had back and belly pain which my pregnancy books described as symptoms of early LABOR.  After laying down on my side for a little while, the pain went away and I tried to convince myself that I had just pulled a muscle.  Then I spent the afternoon and evening worrying because my stomach felt tighter than normal and the baby wasn’t moving around at all…which culminated in my drinking a big glass of cranberry juice at ten o’clock, just to make sure s/he was okay before I went to bed. 

I feel better today…and little miss or mister is keeping me company as I write this post…but I never realized how SCARY the not-knowing would be.  I think I’m a little gun-shy after my last experience with the ER…I don’t want to end up being the pregnant woman who cried wolf, but I equally don’t want to ignore something real!  I’ve just decided to try lying down on my side for a while before making any decisions to call, and I think I was right to do that yesterday.

I think all of the worry came to a head because a few of the bloggers I follow are dealing with pre-term labor issues (granted, they are both pregnant with twins), and I know people in real life (and of course reality tv stars) who have had babies right around the gestational age our baby is now.  I know that there is NO REASON why there would be anything that causes me to go into pre-term labor, but UGH!  I just want a healthy baby in my arms at the end of all of this.  I guess the worry never really ends though, even after the baby is born…right moms? 😉

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7 Comments »

  1. jsutera654 said,

    Aww friend! I’m sorry you’ve been a little bit freaked out. I can’t even begin to imagine all the fears that swirl around a mom-to-be’s mind so I give you MAJOR props for trusting your instinct even though you were afraid at the time. You’re doing a great job. xoxo

  2. Em said,

    I hear ya! It’s so easy to let your mind go the way of worry. One thing my doc said that has helped is that if the pain can subside by changing position or if it goes away then I’m okay. If I can’t get comfortable ever and the pain never stops then I know to be worried.

    • lifebytheday said,

      Oh lord Em, THANK YOU! That helps me SO MUCH!

  3. Kari said,

    I remember those fears all too well. I have to tell you the fear didn’t stop for me after the baby came, like I was really hoping it would. Now I worry about him all the time still. If you ever feel worried or like something isn’t right don’t be afraid to call or go in. They see it all the time, and it’s your baby and your body. You deserve to be reassured. Glad the laying down helped. Hope the back and belly pain stays away!!

  4. Alenka said,

    I know this is really scary – I ended up in labor&delivery last week (at 22 weeks) with some weird pain that would not go away even after resting. All was fine, it took 3-4 days for it to completely go away and it was most likely related to uterus expanding and a growth spurt. So pregnancy discomfort are very normal, they are just very scary.
    And as for if the worrying ever ends, NO! The worrying part gets worse when the baby is born as you have almost full control over keeping him/her alive (as oppose to the belly part where there is only so much you can do). But it gets better and better as the baby grows. And all of it is absolutely amazing, to have a newborn at home! Good luck with everything!

  5. jobo said,

    Wow, I never thought of it that way. Wondering what certain feelings are or if you aren’t feeling the baby at a certain moment. I think I’d be paranoid too, but I am glad you are listening to your body and just figuring it out. You are a good mama already my friend 🙂

  6. iamstacey said,

    I think every woman has worries and fears through pregnancy, especially first time moms. And most especially first time infertile preggos! 🙂
    I get so nervous we ended up renting a doppler so I can listen to the heartbeat when I get worried.


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