September 17, 2010

And my hope comes tumbling down…

Posted in Infertility, IVF tagged , , at 2:36 pm by lifebytheday

I seriously feel like Humpty Dumpty…like I’ve just been smashed to pieces for the millionth time.

Just got our fert report.

Out of 7 retrieved…only 4 were mature, and 3 fertilized.  I seriously never in a million years thought that less than 6 or 7 would have fertilized – I just figured that if they only got 7, then they must have hand-picked the mature ones!

I honestly don’t know what to do or think now.  I called my RE to see if he recommends us transferring all three (if they even make it to transfer) and if he has any ideas as to why we got such a low number.  I guess it doesn’t really matter, but I just NEED to know.

I am so discouraged. 😦

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Update:  I just heard back from my RE.  He reminded me that in all of my past cycles only half of the eggs were mature each time.  So this cycle is comparable, it just seems lower because we started with fewer eggs.  He’s still hopeful that by growing and retrieving fewer eggs that they’ll be better quality, and still seems to be relatively optimistic.

I also asked him about transferring three embryos and he was willing to discuss the possibility.  However, he was pretty adamant that “age trumps quality” and said that he’s seen several instances where less than perfect quality embryos implanted in younger patients.  He brought up the idea of selective reduction in the case of triplets, and when I said that we would never consider that, he said “then we can’t transfer three.” 

So all in all, I’m still nervous, but I feel a bit better…just trying to stay calm and hopeful.

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10 Comments »

  1. jsutera654 said,

    Aw babe. I’m so sorry you are feeling discouraged – I wish I could say or do SOMETHING to make you feel better, make things change for the better or SOMETHING. sending you lots of hugs and much love.

  2. Haidee said,

    I’m so sorry you feel so shattered by your results. I know it’s a total cliche but it really does only take one. I really hope you get to transfer all three or you get a lovely perfect little emby from your three to transfer. If you’re used to big numbers and they haven’t worked before then perhaps the quality of these three little embies could be just the ticket to that BFP. I think I will feel the same as I got 18 eggs last time but my dosage has been dropped significantly this cycle so I know I will be dealing with the same emotions. Quality over quantity! All the best hon!

  3. Haidee said,

    Oh, and can I just add that the fact that only 4 of them were mature and 3 of those fertilised is a 75% fert rate so that’s great. (((BIG HUG))) Hang in there.

  4. bek said,

    It does only take 1! I had 7 on ER and 4 fertilized, 2 were implanted and 2 are snowbabies. I am currently 10 weeks pregnant. So, please stay encouraged, and positive and keep the faith!!!!!! Focus all your energy on positive and confident thoughts! It can and will happen! Blessings to you!

  5. egghunt said,

    Ok I don’t want to diminish your feelings because i know what you’re feeling and it’s completely rational. It’s heartbreaking that we know so much and we have so many previous cycles to compare against because it’s impossible not to compare. But like Haidee said of those that were mature 3 out of 4 fertilised and that is definitely something to hold onto. I wish you had more and I think we always want a higher number, its just natural. But you are still in this with a shot. I’m holding onto the hope that those 3 are fighters and that they’ll carry on growing and dividing and be spectacular lovely embryos to be transferred in a few days time. xxx

  6. jolene1079 said,

    I am sure it is hard to not get discouraged either way, and all we can all do is support you, pray and hope for the best. XO friend.

  7. Debbie said,

    I know you have heard these stories a hundred times, but I went through IVF in April and they only retrieved 4 eggs of the 4 eggs 2 were mature and fertilized. They put those two eggs back and I am now 23 weeks pregnant. It only takes one. Stay positive.

  8. Kari said,

    My fingers and toes are crossed so tightly for you!! Try not to loose hope. It’s hard I know, but focus all your energy on those 3 you’ve got growing there.

  9. egghunt said,

    Just saw your update and am pleased your RE was able to reassure you that things are still hopeful. Its so stressful isn’t it? I hope you are doing OK. Look after yourself.

  10. Rachel said,

    My eggs suck. I’m currently pregnancy with donor eggs BUT the only cycle where I had fertilization resulted in a pregnancy. My numbers are something like this: 3 cycles, 3 eggs ferlitilized, 2 survived to transfer, 1 was only 4 cells and the other was 8 with fragmentation…and it implanted just fine. I remember how devastated I was but all that worry was for not. Don’t give up hope!


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