May 13, 2010
Ups and downs
I have a feeling that this entire 2WW is going to be one big roller coaster, and yesterday definitely didn’t disappoint. I found out that none of our remaining embryos were able to be frozen, but still haven’t been able to connect with anyone to find out WHY. I called and called yesterday and finally got a message from the director of the lab and then came home to this letter:
The Fertility Center Laboratory and the entire team of the Reproductive Medicine and IVF practice wish you the very best of success with your treatment. The laboratory wishes to inform you that no embryos were cryopreserved from your recent IVF cycle.
That’s it. No explanation, no “we REGRET to inform you,” nothing.
Seriously, the only thing that saved me from a hardcore downward spiral is the fact that all day yesterday I kept feeling these little twingy cramps on my left side. That would have been perfect timing for implantation, so it gave me a lift. I can’t remember whether I felt anything like that in my previous cycles, but I’m holding out hope that it was indeed implantation and that it won’t matter that we don’t have any other embryos as backup.
If this cycle is another Big Fat Negative, I don’t know what we’re going to do. Even with ICSI we are getting terrible quality embryos! It’s been suggested, and I have to agree, that it’s probably a lot to do with the fact that they have to seesaw the meds with me, in order to prevent hyper-stimulation. So the eggs grow a lot, and then they stall out…grow, stall, grow, stall…makes sense to me that the quality wouldn’t be the best. I just don’t know how else we could do it!
Please God we don’t have to worry about a new plan and another cycle…we really want THESE babies, please!