May 11, 2010

Random rambles

Posted in Infertility, IVF, Life tagged , at 10:55 am by lifebytheday

My brain is mush today, but I just have a few things to share:

  1. My beta (blood test) is May 22nd, so I have a full two weeks to worry, obsess and analyze every symptom.  I don’t think that I will test myself (unless I get a positive beta, and then I will just to see the +!).  I honestly don’t know how I’m going to make it – you’re probably going to see my posts get more and more desperate and nonsensical, lol.
  2. This morning, I went downstairs to make myself a snack, at which point my work cell rang and I ran back up to the office to answer it.  This is important for two reasons:
         a. I know it isn’t rational, but I had a momentary freak out that I just jogged my babies right out of my uterus.  Again, not rational = me, I know that.  Does it make me less crazy if I recognize that I’m crazy?
         b. For the first time in my life, I felt my @$$ jiggle so much that it actually HURT as I ran up the stairs.  I know that part of that is from the PIO shots, but seriously, I’ve never had so much bounce back in my life! 😛
  3. I’m meeting up with my former boss and another colleague for dinner tonight, so I think I’m going to have to do my own PIO shots in whatever restaurant bathroom I end up!  I’m kind of traumatized – these are BIG needles, and I just got used to S doing the shots – but if we are pregnant, I’ll have to do these shots for 10-12 weeks, so I’d better figure it out sooner or later, right?  Eek!

Okay, that’s it…I know that you wouldn’t have been able to make it through the day without these very important pieces of information…so thanks for humoring me. 😉



  1. jsutera654 said,

    You are a riot, friend. Seriously – despite all of the ups and downs, worries and fears and anxiety, you still have your humor which I love!! May 22 DOES seem far away but let’s look at it this way – we’ll just have to find LOTS of things to take up all of your time so you have no time to think about it. How’s that sound?

  2. Squashgirl said,

    If it makes you feel better I don’t know what it feels like NOT to have things feel jiggly going up and down stairs… ever. *sigh* May 22nd is 2 weeks away but I know you will have what it takes to wait it out, good for you for waiting on the beta! I know its easy to start over analyzing every symptom and there is no way to really know until you get the + but we are here to listen for sure! And like Jess said keep you busy!!

  3. Kelly said,

    I had to laugh at 2(a) re: jogging your babies out. I had a similar experience after my transfer – deep down, I knew it wasn’t rational but I was genuinely upset when it happened. i don’t envy your wait until the 22nd. Good luck with the shots! 🙂

  4. Meg said,

    I second you on the wobbly bits – you will get used to it and eventually use them for momentum!

    I believe that your blog is your sanctuary – if you need to get something out because you are going to burst, or your mind is scattered and you use the blog to center your thoughts – the more power to you. This is your catharsis – use it at your leisure!


  5. jolene1079 said,

    Seriously, I am cracking up at the “bounce back” – that is a riot, and agree with everyone’s points here! Your blog IS your sanctuary and ramble on friend, ramble! It’s SO helpful, isn’t it? I’m with you on that and pulling for you in every way!!!

  6. egghunt said,

    Hey! I am just catching up on all your posts since i’ve been away. I’m really sorry I wasn’t around to give you some hugs during the retrieval/fertilisation stages but reading back it looks like you did REALLY WELL!! I’m so happy for you to have 2 little embies tucked up and please know that I am totally in this insane 2ww with you. To the point where I had the exact same thought myself about dislodging my embryo as I ran up our stairs this morning! I am trying to take it easy (even though my clinic says it won’t make any difference at all to the outcome) but I think the most important thing is to keep the mind busy…,, maybe we need to share some tips together on that one as it is definitely not one of my strong points!!!
    Anyway, hang in there and i”ll try to do the same. My beta BT is on 21 May but I won’t get the result till the following day because I”m an out of town patient. So realistically we will both be getting our results on the same day (although I gues with the time difference I’ll be slightly ahead of you?). I am freaking out about that already and am fairly sure I won’t poas either, I can’t bear the thought of only one line so I think I may just hold out for the phone call too……. Thinking of you!

  7. elaine said,

    I loved reading this post! “Just jogged my babies right out of my uterus” LOL and the ass giggling bit! Too funny! Sending you good vibes!

  8. 21reena said,

    omg- i’m the same way during the 2WW…so ramble away! I know I’m late for your dinner – but my DH had a dinner one night and I was gonna hire a nurse to give me the PIO, but my RE clinic said that the stims are the ones that need to be right on time – the PIO is a supplement, like a vitamin, so they should be around the same time…so maybe for future dinners, you can wait til you get home 🙂

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